Sunday, October 26, 2008
Hello...Anyone?
Hello Creative Writing student?s I am alive. But I am wondering if I am still linked on to Ms. S page.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Let's Go Fly....
Tiny fingers hold on to the threads of color, sound, and motion. With steady hands, he has grasped the concept that others only dare reach for. They negotiate with the surrounding air, communicating with small tugs and gentle pulls. Ecstatic, it goes higher and higher, past the height of his friends and parents, past the city horizon, soaring above the clouds themselves until it can no longer be seen. The only traces of it remain intertwined between his fingers, and the expression in his smile.
As his teacher calls his name in the dim lighting of the classroom, he loses his hold and the magnificent kite, with streamers trailing, flies out of his mind, and into the sky behind the window.
As his teacher calls his name in the dim lighting of the classroom, he loses his hold and the magnificent kite, with streamers trailing, flies out of his mind, and into the sky behind the window.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Ahura Mazda
Ahura Mazda
I was just too caught up trying to be happy, even if it was selfish and synthetic forms of it. Selfish because my physical body did not know how to handle this virus overload of happiness, and synthetic because although my computer was crashing, my monitor shined all the same. But now I can honestly say that my tear drop is the realest thing I have seen my body produce; there is no copy & paste for it and I am finally okay with that.
But things happened so suddenly, and when the continuous flow of memories of you and me were cut off and I found myself forcing to spit you out, I could no longer differentiate between tastes. Those were the scary moments. My senses left me with a parched mouth and bleached world. I was scared that the salt in my tears would only dry up my blank pallet, rather than nourish it. When I meet my former self through dreams or pictures it makes me realize how ugly a numbed mind can be; I found the beauty in crying and hopefully I can come close to doing it as gracefully as you did.
I can now see a writer, philosopher, and comedian, and I will willingly cry for brittle bones, empty pages, and silent rooms.
I currently cry for happiness, blonde hair and jazz hands.
I see music and movement and I will weep for her too. And I will sob with a sour lemon in my mouth for the joy of taste it brings me.
I smile because we smiled and I cry because we cried. I now know that I need both sides to pay respectable homage to you. My tears alone will not give your memory justice, but rather the smile I show when your name is mentioned. And now that I am able to embrace both sides I have the feeling that I found you again inside of me.
I live the dual life of Ying and Yang. Angra Mainyu and Spenta Mainyu collided together inside of my body and I have never felt so alive. I have entered an endless circle of where gray is the dominant color, but all are present if we wish to see them. I contently accept that I will forever spin on this axis knowing that my tears are wound around the happiest moments of my life.
I was just too caught up trying to be happy, even if it was selfish and synthetic forms of it. Selfish because my physical body did not know how to handle this virus overload of happiness, and synthetic because although my computer was crashing, my monitor shined all the same. But now I can honestly say that my tear drop is the realest thing I have seen my body produce; there is no copy & paste for it and I am finally okay with that.
But things happened so suddenly, and when the continuous flow of memories of you and me were cut off and I found myself forcing to spit you out, I could no longer differentiate between tastes. Those were the scary moments. My senses left me with a parched mouth and bleached world. I was scared that the salt in my tears would only dry up my blank pallet, rather than nourish it. When I meet my former self through dreams or pictures it makes me realize how ugly a numbed mind can be; I found the beauty in crying and hopefully I can come close to doing it as gracefully as you did.
I can now see a writer, philosopher, and comedian, and I will willingly cry for brittle bones, empty pages, and silent rooms.
I currently cry for happiness, blonde hair and jazz hands.
I see music and movement and I will weep for her too. And I will sob with a sour lemon in my mouth for the joy of taste it brings me.
I smile because we smiled and I cry because we cried. I now know that I need both sides to pay respectable homage to you. My tears alone will not give your memory justice, but rather the smile I show when your name is mentioned. And now that I am able to embrace both sides I have the feeling that I found you again inside of me.
I live the dual life of Ying and Yang. Angra Mainyu and Spenta Mainyu collided together inside of my body and I have never felt so alive. I have entered an endless circle of where gray is the dominant color, but all are present if we wish to see them. I contently accept that I will forever spin on this axis knowing that my tears are wound around the happiest moments of my life.
Monday, February 25, 2008
2-4-08
2-4-08
By Hope VandenAkker
The beats of our hearts were once the same.
Our palms carried thin silence.
We held our hands up together,
And our heart beats were the same.
Sound absorbed us and cradled us,
We nestled within the comforting womb;
Measures and music and melody,
And our heart beats were the same.
The waves crashed;
Although sandy beaches recorded our footsteps.
We felt invisible to everything,
Except a midnight sky and ocean air.
And on the verge of disappearing through a veil of reality,
Our heart beats were still the same.
Our hearts would beat faster as we would climb
The climatic height of metal tracks
Coming down we swore our hearts would leave us
And fly as high as our arms were stretched up
And as wide as our smiles lengthened,
Falling below pavement and people,
But still beating all the same.
And our hearts would slow,
With the discussion that 3 A.M. brought to us,
Easing down our bodies from the excitement of the day,
But never,
Coming
To a
Stop.
By Hope VandenAkker
The beats of our hearts were once the same.
Our palms carried thin silence.
We held our hands up together,
And our heart beats were the same.
Sound absorbed us and cradled us,
We nestled within the comforting womb;
Measures and music and melody,
And our heart beats were the same.
The waves crashed;
Although sandy beaches recorded our footsteps.
We felt invisible to everything,
Except a midnight sky and ocean air.
And on the verge of disappearing through a veil of reality,
Our heart beats were still the same.
Our hearts would beat faster as we would climb
The climatic height of metal tracks
Coming down we swore our hearts would leave us
And fly as high as our arms were stretched up
And as wide as our smiles lengthened,
Falling below pavement and people,
But still beating all the same.
And our hearts would slow,
With the discussion that 3 A.M. brought to us,
Easing down our bodies from the excitement of the day,
But never,
Coming
To a
Stop.
Women's Liberation: Movement
Women’s Liberation: Movement
By Hope VandenAkker
My feet are Barbie feet,
And although they do wander through a magical garden at times,
They do so without the aide of a tiara and stilettos.
Maybe they do slip into short dresses for bedtime,
And even shorter ones for the morning,
But they will not be found waltzing in a synthetic dream,
Through rooms of molded plastic.
Unlike Barbie, my feet can hold me up;
They can move without someone else’s permission.
By Hope VandenAkker
My feet are Barbie feet,
And although they do wander through a magical garden at times,
They do so without the aide of a tiara and stilettos.
Maybe they do slip into short dresses for bedtime,
And even shorter ones for the morning,
But they will not be found waltzing in a synthetic dream,
Through rooms of molded plastic.
Unlike Barbie, my feet can hold me up;
They can move without someone else’s permission.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
FireFlie
By Hope VandenAkker
She is part of my open arms,
The circle of non-genetic faces
With different roots from a different tree.
We are not bound by DNA,
But rather by our spiritual composition
Consisting of the twisted strands of soul.
The soil we are planted in does not
Define the term “family,”
But rather how close our branches blossom
Through the nourishing of
Sun, stars, and rain.
Her name cups the blue of her eyes,
And the gold of her hair.
A lucid dream is not even as free
As her thoughts,Floating in breathing oxygen,
Waiting for you to inhale.
She is a holder of my memories;
Present in a scattered red graveyard
To give respect to those who fall underneath
Our feet’s’ current.
She captures exploding campfires in her jar,
And shelves them next to
The dangerous floorboards of an abanded house,
And the muddy adventures of a neighborhood trail.
Happiness is taped on her walls,
Held together with recycled stickies
And a snow day.
And if one day,
You find yourself ever looking up,
You just might be able
To see her face in the sky.
She is part of my open arms,
The circle of non-genetic faces
With different roots from a different tree.
We are not bound by DNA,
But rather by our spiritual composition
Consisting of the twisted strands of soul.
The soil we are planted in does not
Define the term “family,”
But rather how close our branches blossom
Through the nourishing of
Sun, stars, and rain.
Her name cups the blue of her eyes,
And the gold of her hair.
A lucid dream is not even as free
As her thoughts,Floating in breathing oxygen,
Waiting for you to inhale.
She is a holder of my memories;
Present in a scattered red graveyard
To give respect to those who fall underneath
Our feet’s’ current.
She captures exploding campfires in her jar,
And shelves them next to
The dangerous floorboards of an abanded house,
And the muddy adventures of a neighborhood trail.
Happiness is taped on her walls,
Held together with recycled stickies
And a snow day.
And if one day,
You find yourself ever looking up,
You just might be able
To see her face in the sky.
Friday, January 11, 2008
I have nothing to blog about. Which is kinda weird because I have not been able to find my journal for the past 3 months. I have been using scrap pieces of printer paper, which definitly does not have the same effect and are easily lost (more easily lost than my already lost journal.) I have been getting frantic bouts of panic when I have something in my head I need to write down and then realize that I don't know were my journal is. I never really thought I could write it on the computer until about now.
So I am kinda excited about this midterm stuff. I have a few good ideas, but I am not sure which one I will physically maniefest yet.
So I am kinda excited about this midterm stuff. I have a few good ideas, but I am not sure which one I will physically maniefest yet.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
P.S (Way re-edited!!)
I am not afraid,
Of the slipping memories.
They seem to have fallen out of my brain,
And weigh me down on my back
Until they find some white current
To take them away.
But I am not afraid,
because I know it is not in memories
Where you are found.
I love where you seed planted itself:
In the bottom of my spine,
In the crevice of my tailbone.
There you are a suprise
In wrikinled wrapping,
Waiting for morning.
You are found in me.
I love how your ribbons are
Anchored
In the marrow of my bones,
Passing me the words you cannot say,
Or the love you cannot give.
I unconsciously carry you-
Or do you carry me?
I love it when I don't think about you,
Because you still grow.
When I neglect you, you still love.
When I lose you,
You always find me:
In the fallen leaf of your hair,
Or the mental imaage of an ocean
That I still find ourselves walking on,
In a perfect world.
This world is not
near
perfect.
At least we can dance now,
though,
I carry you in heavy arms and
Deep pilies,
My leg is yours,
My hips,
And my lungs-
But I wish you took my heart.
Take my heart,
Because, please, you have it now.
Youa re my wallpaper:
All those slipping memories
That I cannot remember.
Every night,
I fall asleep with you next to me,
and dream inside our photos,
Still flying through a pefect world.
Of the slipping memories.
They seem to have fallen out of my brain,
And weigh me down on my back
Until they find some white current
To take them away.
But I am not afraid,
because I know it is not in memories
Where you are found.
I love where you seed planted itself:
In the bottom of my spine,
In the crevice of my tailbone.
There you are a suprise
In wrikinled wrapping,
Waiting for morning.
You are found in me.
I love how your ribbons are
Anchored
In the marrow of my bones,
Passing me the words you cannot say,
Or the love you cannot give.
I unconsciously carry you-
Or do you carry me?
I love it when I don't think about you,
Because you still grow.
When I neglect you, you still love.
When I lose you,
You always find me:
In the fallen leaf of your hair,
Or the mental imaage of an ocean
That I still find ourselves walking on,
In a perfect world.
This world is not
near
perfect.
At least we can dance now,
though,
I carry you in heavy arms and
Deep pilies,
My leg is yours,
My hips,
And my lungs-
But I wish you took my heart.
Take my heart,
Because, please, you have it now.
Youa re my wallpaper:
All those slipping memories
That I cannot remember.
Every night,
I fall asleep with you next to me,
and dream inside our photos,
Still flying through a pefect world.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Like OMG!
I have realized how much more dumb people sound when they say "like." I am sure it must lower your I.Q a few points.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Albert Einstein
Albert Einstein is THE MAN! Like honestly, I am really facinated by him, more and more everyday. I really want to write a research paper about him, but I have no class to do it for...maybe I will just get ahead on those college essays. haha. But for real, I am really interested in him.
Here are a few of my favorite words from him:
"My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to percevie with our frail and feeble mind."
AMEN TO THAT BROTHER!
"Every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving. "
Here are a few of my favorite words from him:
"My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to percevie with our frail and feeble mind."
AMEN TO THAT BROTHER!
"Every day I remind myself that my inner and outer life are based on the labors of other men, living and dead, and that I must exert myself in order to give in the same measure as I have received and am still receiving. "
Thursday, November 22, 2007
I am thankful for:
1) My knowledge I have about life, and how short it is. I am glad I understand it so I can use my time wisely. I am also thankful that I understand how precious it is. I am glad I can relate to people. I am thankful that I understand of what some of the evil is in the world, and not to think that it doesn't exist. I am thankful for the things I know, and that I have a passion to learn more. I am also thankful that I use the power I have to change the things in the world that I don't like. And if it is not physical steps to change it, then it is the feeling of compassion, which is always the first step.
2) My healthy body. Without it I would not be able to dance, and that is what I love to do. Even though it can get stressful at times, I am really grateful I have something productive to put my energy and focus into and that keeps my body fit. I am so so so lucky to be healthy, and it is something I try not to take for granted because I can understand somewhat what living with a physical drawback is like.
3) My friends. The ones now and the one who has passed. I am thankful I have the ones with me. I don't really know what I would do without my special few. I am thankful for all of them, and I am thankful for my angels who sent them to me at th most perfect times. I am thankful for Sam and everything she did for me while she was here and all the great memories I have with her. I am thankful for how I grew up with her, and how much I learned while I was around her. I am thankful for the person who I am because of my friends.
4) I am thankful for my family. I am thankful that we are pretty well-off for the most part. Although I do stress about the funds for my sister and I to get to college, I know all will be well. I am thankful that we are better off than most, and don't have to be too stressed out of the money we spend. I am thankful that I have such good parents. They are a perfect balance, not to overbearing and into my life, but we are still fairly close. That is the best I can ask for and it is a lot better than the relationships other teens have with their parents. I am thankful my dad owns a store that I can work at and have a job. I am extremely thankul for my job and I love the people I work with. They are some of my best friends and so unique. They are my out-side of school support and continue to broden my mind and make me laugh everyday. I am so thankful I have a job I that I can somewhat look forward to going to.
5) I am so thankful I live in America. Honestly, although there are a lot of government things going on that I don't agree with, I know I could be a lot worse off. I am thankful for being safe where I live and that I don't have to live in fear.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Thanksgiving, the act of giving thanks. Lets all stop for a bit and remind our selves of the positive things we have going for us. We don't need a special day to do this, it can happen anyday. But it is nice that there is a day that we can stop our daily routine and remind ourselves of the things we truely are thankful for.
1) My knowledge I have about life, and how short it is. I am glad I understand it so I can use my time wisely. I am also thankful that I understand how precious it is. I am glad I can relate to people. I am thankful that I understand of what some of the evil is in the world, and not to think that it doesn't exist. I am thankful for the things I know, and that I have a passion to learn more. I am also thankful that I use the power I have to change the things in the world that I don't like. And if it is not physical steps to change it, then it is the feeling of compassion, which is always the first step.
2) My healthy body. Without it I would not be able to dance, and that is what I love to do. Even though it can get stressful at times, I am really grateful I have something productive to put my energy and focus into and that keeps my body fit. I am so so so lucky to be healthy, and it is something I try not to take for granted because I can understand somewhat what living with a physical drawback is like.
3) My friends. The ones now and the one who has passed. I am thankful I have the ones with me. I don't really know what I would do without my special few. I am thankful for all of them, and I am thankful for my angels who sent them to me at th most perfect times. I am thankful for Sam and everything she did for me while she was here and all the great memories I have with her. I am thankful for how I grew up with her, and how much I learned while I was around her. I am thankful for the person who I am because of my friends.
4) I am thankful for my family. I am thankful that we are pretty well-off for the most part. Although I do stress about the funds for my sister and I to get to college, I know all will be well. I am thankful that we are better off than most, and don't have to be too stressed out of the money we spend. I am thankful that I have such good parents. They are a perfect balance, not to overbearing and into my life, but we are still fairly close. That is the best I can ask for and it is a lot better than the relationships other teens have with their parents. I am thankful my dad owns a store that I can work at and have a job. I am extremely thankul for my job and I love the people I work with. They are some of my best friends and so unique. They are my out-side of school support and continue to broden my mind and make me laugh everyday. I am so thankful I have a job I that I can somewhat look forward to going to.
5) I am so thankful I live in America. Honestly, although there are a lot of government things going on that I don't agree with, I know I could be a lot worse off. I am thankful for being safe where I live and that I don't have to live in fear.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Thanksgiving, the act of giving thanks. Lets all stop for a bit and remind our selves of the positive things we have going for us. We don't need a special day to do this, it can happen anyday. But it is nice that there is a day that we can stop our daily routine and remind ourselves of the things we truely are thankful for.
Saturday, November 10, 2007
Lyrics
I have so many lyrics floating in my head, I just have to get them out somewhere.
"Back in the place when we were young
Back in the place we started from"
-The Redwalls
"And we'll all shine on
Like the moon
And the stars
and the sun."
-John Lennon
"There are books
that never should be written,
There are words
that never should be said.
There is nothing I can do about it
Cause the words are always in my head"
-The Shout Out Louds
"And I keep thinking tomorrow is coming today
So I am endlessly waiting."
-The Counting Crows
"I'm in heaven when you smile."
-The Redwalls
"And instead of saying all of your goodbyes
Let them realize that time goes fast
it's hard to make the good things last
you realize the sun don't go down
it's just an illusion caused
by the world
spinnin' round."
-The Flaming Lips
"Look up
What do you see?
All of you and all of me."
-R.E.M
Of course these just happen to be in my mind at this time. My imagination can fill in the music, vocals, and dramatic pauses so of course it is going to be better in my mind than in yours. The words are only half the preformance and might not mean as much to you as they do to me. And like I said, these are just annoying ones that were attacking my brain at this late hour.
"Back in the place when we were young
Back in the place we started from"
-The Redwalls
"And we'll all shine on
Like the moon
And the stars
and the sun."
-John Lennon
"There are books
that never should be written,
There are words
that never should be said.
There is nothing I can do about it
Cause the words are always in my head"
-The Shout Out Louds
"And I keep thinking tomorrow is coming today
So I am endlessly waiting."
-The Counting Crows
"I'm in heaven when you smile."
-The Redwalls
"And instead of saying all of your goodbyes
Let them realize that time goes fast
it's hard to make the good things last
you realize the sun don't go down
it's just an illusion caused
by the world
spinnin' round."
-The Flaming Lips
"Look up
What do you see?
All of you and all of me."
-R.E.M
Of course these just happen to be in my mind at this time. My imagination can fill in the music, vocals, and dramatic pauses so of course it is going to be better in my mind than in yours. The words are only half the preformance and might not mean as much to you as they do to me. And like I said, these are just annoying ones that were attacking my brain at this late hour.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
This does not have a title yet.
I love our colored pictures,
Even though my eyes only sees the shades of gray.
I love where your seed planted itself,
In the bottom of my spine,
In the crevice of my tailbone,.
There you are wrapped up
In wrinkled Christmas wrapping
And lay there,
Waiting for Christmas morning.
I love how your ribbons are
Buried
In the marrow of my bones.
I unconsciously carry you,
Or do you carry me?
I love it when I don’t think about you,
Because you still grow.
When I neglect you, you still love.
And when I lose you
You will always find me.
You are the reason for my numbness,
But you are the only thing I can feel.
I love how we can dance now.
I carry you in heavy arms and
Deep pliés.
My leg is yours,
As well as my ribcage
And my lungs.
I wish you took my heart.
Take my heart,
Because you have it now.
I love that you are the lyrics inside my song,
The piercing through my skin,
And the star inside my apple.
You are my wallpaper.
I fall asleep with you next to me
Every night
And I dream inside our photos.
I love it how you take me to the past,
Even though the past is bittersweet.
I love you.
Even though my eyes only sees the shades of gray.
I love where your seed planted itself,
In the bottom of my spine,
In the crevice of my tailbone,.
There you are wrapped up
In wrinkled Christmas wrapping
And lay there,
Waiting for Christmas morning.
I love how your ribbons are
Buried
In the marrow of my bones.
I unconsciously carry you,
Or do you carry me?
I love it when I don’t think about you,
Because you still grow.
When I neglect you, you still love.
And when I lose you
You will always find me.
You are the reason for my numbness,
But you are the only thing I can feel.
I love how we can dance now.
I carry you in heavy arms and
Deep pliés.
My leg is yours,
As well as my ribcage
And my lungs.
I wish you took my heart.
Take my heart,
Because you have it now.
I love that you are the lyrics inside my song,
The piercing through my skin,
And the star inside my apple.
You are my wallpaper.
I fall asleep with you next to me
Every night
And I dream inside our photos.
I love it how you take me to the past,
Even though the past is bittersweet.
I love you.
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Happiness
This is a love poem to Happiness,
Because dear Happiness,
I love you.
I love the way you make me feel
When you look my way,
Unleashing the cage of butterflies
And giving reason to my smile,
Because dear Happiness,
I don’t need a better reason to smile
Than you.
Those nights,
Dear Happiness,
Those nights when you find me alone,
You take me to my albums of photos,
My piles of memories,
And my clips of art,
All created by you.
And I owe you.
You gave me my birth name.
You gave me my eyes
My mouth
And my toes.
You even gave me my crooked nose
Which I do thank you for
Because without it I would not be able to smell you in spring
And have you turn it red in winter.
Happiness,
I love finding you under some old socks,
Or in my locker.
I love it when you are in kitchen
I love it when you are
Snuggled in the corner fireplace
Spitting out warm embers around me
Keeping me safe.
I love seeing you next to
A coffee stained mug
And an empty gallon of milk.
I love it when you come out of my speakers
Grabbing me lower back
Taking up my right arm
Teaching me the right steps to take.
I love the freedom you give to my body.
And what I do not do out of my love
I do out of you.
I do it all
Out of happiness.
Because dear Happiness,
I love you.
I love the way you make me feel
When you look my way,
Unleashing the cage of butterflies
And giving reason to my smile,
Because dear Happiness,
I don’t need a better reason to smile
Than you.
Those nights,
Dear Happiness,
Those nights when you find me alone,
You take me to my albums of photos,
My piles of memories,
And my clips of art,
All created by you.
And I owe you.
You gave me my birth name.
You gave me my eyes
My mouth
And my toes.
You even gave me my crooked nose
Which I do thank you for
Because without it I would not be able to smell you in spring
And have you turn it red in winter.
Happiness,
I love finding you under some old socks,
Or in my locker.
I love it when you are in kitchen
I love it when you are
Snuggled in the corner fireplace
Spitting out warm embers around me
Keeping me safe.
I love seeing you next to
A coffee stained mug
And an empty gallon of milk.
I love it when you come out of my speakers
Grabbing me lower back
Taking up my right arm
Teaching me the right steps to take.
I love the freedom you give to my body.
And what I do not do out of my love
I do out of you.
I do it all
Out of happiness.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
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